And our hands feel empty though they’re full, all the time

There have been multiple points in my life lately in which I have found it necessary to “plead the fifth”. I always seem to forget that I’m in Canada and that phrase basically means diddlysquat and that I’m attempting to take advantage of a right I do not have.

I once had my hair cut by someone whose summer job was trimming Christmas trees with a machete and it looked good.